Our Bento box photos

Maya's lunch: veggie dog, veggie sticks, cucumbers, ketchup, homemade banana chocolate chip bread, fruit salad! Yum!!

Balancing Super Mum & Satisfactory Employee..with a sick child

Wow, these are the days when I feel it is innately wrong for moms to have to work out of the house.  This may sound strange coming from a pretty liberal, strong, independent woman.  However, I have not kept it a secret that I wish I could be a stay at home mom.  At least for a temporary period.  Or I would love the flexibility to work when/where I want to.  My employer is wonderful.  They are flexible and understanding.  It is my desire to please everyone that causes me internal conflict.  My job is not a "work from home" job by policy.  Therefore it is desirable that I am in the office.  It is also desirable to my sick little angel that that she be home, preferably cuddled in mom's arms.  I am a believer that when you are sick you are officially the king/queen/princess in the house.  You should get control of the TV, you are allowed to whimper and complain and everyone will accommodate you.  So when my girls are sick, even when they are well enough for daycare, I would prefer they get to stay home and rest. So I am usually left in the position of feeling guilty telling work I need the time off or feeling guilty I left my child at childcare where they are not the princess. 

I sincerely wish I could do it all.  I want to take off the employee hat and be the mom when my girls need me.  I wish I could pause certain roles at certain times.  School play?  Pause Professional Jess.  Important Business Meeting?  Pause Mama.  If I could be two people that would be great! 

Ideally I need to find my way.  I need to not feel like I am letting my employer or my child down. I need more telecommuting options.  I need to find a fit where I can give everyone 100% because when I feel I am letting someone down I feel terrible.  I am a hard worker and my integrity is extremely important to me.  Being a great mother is lifelong dream.

Ugh....if we were only independently wealthy I would work for a non-profit, volunteer, and be home for my girls.